I’m old enough to remember magazine headlines like ‘Best and Worst Beach Bodies’ and ‘Worst Celebrity Body EVER’. Most of the contenders were, naturally, women, usually mums, and definitely over 40.
Dimply thighs, flabby tummies, wrinkly skin… every inch of our ‘decaying’ bodies was scrutinised under the microscope for the baying public to judge.
Yup, nothing gets the pitchforks out like a woman who dares to age. Especially one who is bold (or foolish?) enough to wear a bikini at the beach.
How dare these women inflict us with their less-than-perfect bodies!
Ah, how the worm has turned. And about bloody time.
Like many of you, I recently feasted my eyes on photos of former Ironwoman Candice Warner and radio superstar Jackie ‘O’ Henderson – mothers of three and one, respectively – looking in the absolute best shape of their lives.
Let’s not beat around the bush. Their bodies are bloody sensational. Not just for women aged 39 and 49, but by any standard.
Go, ladies! A fit body is hard work – it takes dedication, motivation and time. I respect any woman who works hard in the gym or the track. Candice is a champion – fitness probably comes naturally to her. Yet even after retirement and having three daughters with cricketer David Warner, she has kept it up.
Jackie O, on the other hand, is a little different. She’s not an athlete and has even battled addiction. But today she is sober, happy and at her peak fitness-wise.
She’s single too. Who wouldn’t want to be the man hanging off her arm?
Now let’s get to the prickly bit.
This week I also saw photos of celebrity landscaper Jamie Durie, 54, hitting the beach in Sydney with his model fiancée Ameka Jane and their two children.
I’m going to say what I know most people were thinking when they saw the photos: it was wonderful to see Jamie looking so happy and relaxed with his beautiful family.
And here it comes – and I say this with love – I also couldn’t help but notice how the former Vegas stripper’s once-famous abs had now been replaced with a ‘dad bod’.
There, I said it, and I say it wincing, because as a woman, and a mature woman, I know what it’s like to feel judged by the way my body has ‘aged’.
Jamie’s a handsome man, and he’s had a great career. From Sri-Lankan and Aussie descent, he became a heart-throb for Australian women – first as a dancer for the all-male revue troupe Manpower, then as a TV gardener. He even made it on to Oprah.
I remember having a huge crush on him – and I still do. He’s gorgeous.
Now in his fifties, a father, and about to marry a gorgeous woman, he’s clearly relaxed his fitness routine, and who can blame him? Maintaining the abs he had in his twenties would be a full-time job. And let’s be honest here, his physique was his job. Dancing every night then spending his days toiling in the garden would have been great exercise. But now he’s winding down, Jamie may look a little different, but he’s also never looked happier. I am genuinely pleased for him.
But to return to my point. Why I am comparing Jackie and Candice to Jamie Durie? You see, there’s been a shift – and every woman I know has noticed it.
Gone are the days of the silver fox. Now it’s time for mature women to shine.
Sixty is the new 40, 40 is the new 30… you get my drift. Older women are looking fantastic – and they are looking better than men their age. In my former life as Samantha X, I owned an escort agency for women over 40. My busiest lady was 65.
Society has given us permission to age and age we have – bloody well. We look better now than we did at 25, we are living longer and we are looking sexier at 40, 50, 60 and beyond.
It is finally our time to shine.
And here’s my theory why: more of us are choosing to be single after divorce, we have our own careers, our children are a bit older, or perhaps we chose to remain child-free; we have more disposable income to spend on ourselves, we eat well, we work out, we look after ourselves; some of us choose to have surgery and Botox – after all, it’s our choice.
Compare the average 50-year-old man to a 50 year-old woman these days and the difference is staggering.
No wonder dating can be so miserable.
I’ve lost count of the number of women my age – 50 – who tell me they only date younger men because, as one girlfriend complained to me recently, ‘men my age don’t look after themselves.’
I met a fit woman in her fifties yesterday who just married to a man 24 years younger. ‘We match each other with energy and drive,’ she said. ‘Men my age usually drink too much, eat too much and get complacent.’
Women often get told we look good ‘for our age’ and that we are ‘still’ attractive. Wow – thanks for the compliment! Men, on the other hand, have always been judged first and foremost for their careers, bank balance and who is hanging off their arm. Their appearance, it seems, doesn’t matter as much. Sure, men are objectified from time to time, but in general we have always been so generous, so forgiving towards men with imperfections. We say they have cute ‘dad bods’ – yet I’ve never heard a man lust over a ‘mum bod’.
But times are changing.
The secret’s out: ladies, it is our time to shine. If you’re over 40, it’s time to grab your bikini – because it’s going to be a hot girl summer.
